Well, Maybe He's Not That in to You!

Ok. So, let’s get down to the real nitty gritty.
Let’s zone out and go to another planet.
The one where women possess the power, has the intuition, holds an affirmative attitude, and is not settling for any bull crap.
(Well, that’s Earth, also. Lol)

Listen and I want you to engage like you’ve never engaged before. Chime in and tell me what you think and what you believe.

Him.

  • He can be the crush that you’ve had for some time now and you’re terrified at the fact of approaching him or him approaching you.
  • He could be your child/children’s father or baby daddy, whatever’s comfortable for you, and you guys only get together for sexual pleasures, both of you all’s lacking maturity puts love last.  
  • He could be some dude that only calls you when he’s bored and lonely. He has no desire to move things along with you, as much as you would like him to. You’re just great conversation to him.
  • He could be a friend with benefits. You give him what he wants and he bird feeds you with whatever, whenever, he gets ready.
  • He’s the one that only uses you whenever he needs you, and when you are no longer any use to him, he treats you like a disposal and you cannot seem to find out where y’all relationship went wrong. When it was him all along, but you were too naïve to believe that.

I could go on and on. There are so many different, unapologetic, dispassionate versions of “Him.” Have I met some of them and their unorthodox, repulsive ways, YES. But I am here for you tonight to let you know that it may be time for you to get “U” back.. Cause see, when a man knows what he wants, he gets it; in so many ways. Men tend to be visual creatures. Meaning, if it looks good, then it is good. They aren’t like us women that take the time to see things from a more emotional, rational perspective. I say that to say this, if he isn’t sending you the right signals, leave him in the dirt.

You should not have to do majority of the calling, FaceTiming, texting, moreover, reaching out. If he wanted you, he would stop at nothing to get you! I get irritated at times from hearing the frank opinions and excuses of my friends on why they feel they should do everything to draw a man in and make him feel comfortable while he does “nothing” to make her feel significant.


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When is too much effort enough effort?

What do you say when you have given too much of yourself to a man whose inadequate amount of love, support, or lack thereof, makes you feel less of a queen?

In what instances do you respond to a man that puts too much time into social media, but none into building a home, providing and/or spending quality time with the kids, nor helping you relieve the smallest amount of stress?


You should not be down for these types. Maybe he’s not that in to you, but that’s no excuse for you to be making justifications for him. I had to learn this message also, but the hard way. Once you begin to truly value and love yourself for bomb ass woman you are, then you will see why any man should be honored to have you in their presence, not the other way around.

Have more control over your emotions and depict how you want him to view you. Wimping and crying all the time, he’ll think you need him to coincide with you with the emotions that he is trying so hard to keep under wraps. He’ll become distant. Showing him that you love him, but you don’t need him, keeps them running back every time. I do not know all of the rules to this game, but I do know when it is time to keep it moving and let Mr. Right find me!

All is fair in love and war,
Iman!